Inner Doodles

Mental Note: Must not engage in politics to a level that is detrimental to my health. Teaching kindness and speaking my mind in small capacities still makes a difference. Activism takes many forms, it's not always crucial to be on the front lines every waking moment. But also... shouldn't go AWOL and hide in my closet for days.  Self care: Bubble Baths Lighted Candles Phone Chat with a Good Friend (avoid conversations involving topics that make my blood boil) Doodle END TRANSMISSION

I bought flowers for the front yard. They are an obscene shade of red. I drove the back roads to the grocery. I wanted to keep driving. I wanted to find a shady spot in the middle of nowhere where the clouds were still visible. I wanted to spread out a blanket and eat cherries and drink my iced tea and feel the earth bumpy and warm. I wanted a full car of family and friends to do this with. Instead I returned home, grumpy and tired. I won’t let the Inner Beast win. I get the speaker, my phone, a tarp, and my sleeping bag. I blast bad jazz music and spread out on the grass in my “backyard.” I am at Wolftrap. I am with friends. I am at Wolftrap. I... Hate this song. What kind of jumpy jazz two-note minute-long solo is this?? “You paid for this?” Co-Captain Dad comments while manning the grill. “I supported a local venue for streaming. Yes.” I sip my tea. I swat a mosquito. “I have no regrets,” I say to no one. The red flowers look sublime. END TRANSMISSION